Comedian Chelsea Handler is hosting the VMA's this year, and she has big plans for the evening. "I'll probably have sex with [Eminem] after the show is over. Probably. I don't see why I wouldn't," she told MTV, adding that Swizz could get it too. "I like Swizz Beatz, just because I would like to yell out in bed, 'Swizz Beatz! Keep it coming!'" Awesome. [MTV]

Former 'Girls Gone Wild' insider Ryan Simkin has the inside dope on Paris Hilton. Get it? "I asked if she was flying private, and she said, 'No, commercial.' And then as politely as I could, I asked her how she planned on traveling with that amount of blow and X. She held the box in her right hand, and then with an underhand swoop like a lower case J, she demonstrated exactly how she intended to beat airport security. She even whistled as she did it. A little alley-oop with the Camel Box, straight up her snatch. Classic." That's my roommate!!! Seriously, who does something like that? [Dlisted]